macam-macam 2

for the past few weeks macam-macam perasaan aku rasa...coz there is so many things going on around me. some involving me directly and some are not. Ake kecewa...aku jealous...aku sedih...aku terkejut... aku seronok... aku kecewa kembali... aku terasa hati... aku sedih...my latest mood.... i'm sad...after receiving one message from the person who i believe such thought would never came out from her mind... All I can say is, how could you. Then later i've decided to give up..let it be...just let it go... I'll be happy if everyone is happy... So, takpelah! at least i'm not putting any hope on myself. I think this is not the first time I 'sacrifice' for others, takpelaa.. dah biasa..

Congratulations!!!!

---

Congrats, Kak Eda & Abang Ramli!!!! For their new born baby gurl... wooohooo!!!! Aku lah orang pertama yang dapat tangkap gambar si kecik ni... Bestnye.. dah dapat si Epan (Irfan Haikal-nie bukan nama novel tau! ni nama anak sedara aku), dapat baby gurl pulak. Epan jangan nakal-nakal tau! Epan dah jadi abang long..hehehe...

 

Macam-macam

Pagi tadi, mak call. Aku tengah mandi kelam-kabut nak gi kelas, tak sempat nak jawab. Sekali lagi mak call, kali ni aku tengah nak pakai tudung tapi sempat jawab phone. Sebelum mak call skali lagi tu aku terpikir gak, asal mak call pagi-pagi ni? Ada berita buruk ke? Aku jadi takut.
Aku jawab panggilan mak. Nasib baik takde any bad news. Cuma bad news for my lil' sis,hehe... baju raya dia-yang baru siap tempah-yang aku bekenan sangat-sangat, HILANG. Mak cakap, ada orang curi pasal dia tetinggal kain curi yang lain. Lagipun dah lama dia dok perhati baju-baju rumah jiran aku. Aku, tekejut pun ada, nak gelak pun ada, bengang lagi ada. Tekejut pasal first time ada kes macam ni jadi kat family aku, ada gak ek, orang nak curi baju kurung. Aku biasa tengok anime jepun, orang curi bra and panties je...hahahaha.. Nak gelak pasal....entah! Tapi aku rasa nak gelak laa... Bengang pasal aku pun muat gak pakai baju adik aku tu!!! Bongok punya pencuri!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bongooooooookkkkkkkk!!!!! AAAAAAaaaaaAAAaaaAA!!!! Geram tul la!!! Mak aku cakap dia bukan curi untuk pakai tapi untuk dijual. Haa!!! Maka, sesungguhnya HARAM lah duit hasil jualan tu nanti... PUAS HATI! PADAN MUKA KO PENCURI! Aku ngan adik aku akan tuntut baju tu kat akhirat nanti...hehehee.. Kesian gak kat adik aku, dia yang pilih kain tu kononnya nak pakai baju merah untuk raya. Aku tanya mak, Ain cam mana? Mak cakap dia pun gelak je.. Eleh! dia tu sebenarnya tekilan gak tuh! Saje tak nak tunjuk depan mak aku.. Mak aku? Lagi sepuluh kali tekilan...Hmmm nak buat cam ner ek...

Aku baru habis kelas Islamic Aqidah, kesian kat ustazah tu, aku temenguap-nguap dalam kelas dia tadi. Tapi bila dengar satu fact yang dia bagitau tadi aku terus terbehenti menguap. Selama ni, aku rasa benda tu agak baru dan jarang terjadi atau dibuat oleh perempuan-perempuan. Aku rasa cuma aku ngan geng-geng aku je yang buat perangai cam tu rupanya baru aku tahu ianya FITRAH heheeheh... Suke betul aku dengar ustazah explain tadi. Ustazah aku cakap, it's normal for us (girls, women, she,her, female) to get attracted with handsome or good looking man. Zaman Nabi Yusuf dulu, becuase of his 'handsomeness' he was imprisoned by Siti Zulaika, who's crazy about him. Ustazah cakap, benda tu NATURAL hehehe... Jadi benda yang aku selama ni dok buat, tak lah betul dan tak lah salah...aku rasa HARUS kot..hmmm. Tapi.... tak boleh syok sangat tengok lelaki handsome...Bak kata ustazah, "we still have to recite Astaghfirullah" tapi aku rasa tak salah kalau cakap Alhamdulillah keatas 'nikmat' yang diberi...hehehe...

Hmm nampaknya hajat aku untuk makan chicken chop untuk berbuka terpaksa ditangguhkan lagi... Kene teman cik emma gi jumpa mak dia... tak kisah pun esok aku puasa lagi. Yelah, aku ganti puasa macam buat assignment gak, last minute.

1st entry of the month

hi! Assalamualaikum...
hmmm... looks like this is my 1st entry for this month.. as you can see, i've change my look. it took me one hour to upgrade my looks. huhu... pink? i myself can't believe that i had choose this color coz my color is normally red...but after lot os thinking i've decided to choose pink and black. why? black, bcoz it is easier to match with anything that i paste, and pink coz i guess it's time to change...heheh...that's all i guess..chow!!

p/s: can't wait till next week! i'm going out with my favourite guys...heeheheh!! rezeki jangan ditolak

Who Cathes Your Eyes?

fatihah, your crush is the Boy Next Door
(Quiz from Tickle.com)

Whoever said nice guys finish last was wrong. Whether he lives next door or across town, an honest and hunky hottie will win the heart of a sweet thing like you. You've got your eyes open for a good guy who's responsible and trustworthy. The kind who'll call when he says he will, make you mix CDs, take you out to the movies (and always offer to pay), and treat you like gold — as any guy should!Nice doesn't have to mean boring, after all. You and your crush will have loads of fun whether you're goofing around at the mall, tearing it up on the dance floor, renting a movie, or sharing a romantic walk. Now that'll get the neighbors talking!

Congrats to all and Good Luck for me

Congratulation to Ezrin and Scott for the birth of your new relationship!! wooohoo!! i'm glad that Me and Syima were among the first two who recieved the good news. hmm...And Double Congrats to Syazli for the award, "Pelakon Lelaki Harapan PTS 2005" and for the same reason as Ezrin and Scott. Oh! before I forget, Congatulation too to Dianne, crews and casts of Hungry Ghost, for the award of "Teater Inggeris Terbaik"

Hmmm...everyone is happy... someone is 'extra' happy...and aku tumpang happy for them. Honestly, sedih gak lah... yelah... semua dah sibuk berpasang-pasangan... kalau duduk skali pun sibuk bercerita about pasangan masing-masing... aku lak terpinga-pinga mendengar cerita mereka sambil memberi nasihat-nasihat yang konon-kononnya boleh membantu diorang...huhu. Hmmm nampaknya aku kena berusaha lebih untuk duduk setaraf ngan diorang...huhu Gambatte, atih-chan!!! Maybe this is a lesson from God coz of my choosiness, pickiness and memilih'ness'. Kalau dulu aku hanya memangdang rupa tapi perangai yang ntah apa-apa tapi sekarang aku lebih memandang 'rupa' dalaman tapi kalau dapat yang luaran ok, it's a bonus! All I need to do is to be patient and check balik diri sendiri..

Masihkah Kau Ingat by Kopratasa

Masihkah kau ingat
Pada waktu itu
Sekuntum bunga mekar
Kuselit ke rambutmu

Masihkah kau ingat
Ia menjadi mimpi
Dan menjadi rindu
Masihkah kau ingat

Masihkah kau ingat
Kita berlari-lari
Dikaki langit
Mencari pelangi

Lalu hujan turun
Kita basah bersama
Masihkah kau ingat...
Masihkah kau ingat...

Masihkah kau ingat
Sekuntum bunga itu
Ditapak tangan ini
Ia menjadi layu

Lalu kugenggam
Ia menjadi debu
Masihkah kau ingat...
Masihkah kau ingat...

Masihkah kau ingat
Kita berlari-lari
Dikaki langit
Mencari pelangi

Lalu hujan turun
Kita basah bersama
Masihkah kau ingat...
Masihkah kau ingat...

Sehari telah berlalu...

Hari ni, hari Isnin. Kalau ikutkan ada practice malam ni. Tapi segalanya dah berakhir Sabtu lalu. Semua orang tanya, "So, how was it?" "Macam mana teater ari tu?" "Sape menang?" "How's your theatre?". Jawapan yang aku berani bagi setakat ni, "OKlaa... Aku puas hati dengan play kali ni." tak berani aku nak cakap bebanyak. Aku tak reti pun. Karang ada yang kata aku perasan bagus, overconfident, and macam-macam lagi lah... mulut orang, kita tak boleh nak kawal.

Perasaan aku lepas habis play ni, agak legalaa. Kurang satu beban. Tapi....sedih pun ada jugak. Sedih sebab semuanya hanya tinggal kenangan... Aku nie sentimental orang nyaa... sensitive pun ada gak... Kalau dulu every night practice sambil bergelak ketawa dengan telatah masing-masing, kini, aku hanya boleh tersenyum sendiri bila teringat kenangan lalu... mengalir jugak lah air mata...heheh...

Banyak lagi yang aku nak luahkan tapi tadi baru Amrah call ajak makan. Aku pun memang dah lapar..huhu... Till next time, Chiow!!

Al-Fatihah

Takziah buat sahabatku Hanim Mohd Ismail diatas pemergian ibu saudaranya (aku panggil mak long). Mak long baru sahaja menghembuskan nafas terakhir pada 21hb Ogos 2005.

"Sesungguhnya dari Dia kita datang dan kepada Dia juga kita kembali"

Al-Fatihah...

Dah nak grad dah???

I don't know how to describe my feeling right now... He's graduating this semester?!! Aku confident giler ingat dia grad next sem!!! Memanglah skarang ni dah takde apa-apa tapi... although sometimes he can be a pain in the neck, he's still something for me... Nape cepat sangat???? Kenapa???????!!!! It's like loosing a brother...huhu...

I'm Pocahontas! hehee...

Which Disney heroine are you? Find out @ star-girl.org!

Aku cuma membetulkan apa yang aku rasa salah

Baru-baru ni aku baca buletin dalam 'Friendster' yang bertajuk "MAWI CRAP". Dah banyak aku dapat, dalam e-mail pun ada orang forward-forward kan. Artikel yang aku baca dalam friendster bukanlah dikarang sendiri tapi ni artikel forward-forward.

Mula-mula baca aku gelak lah jugak! Dalam hati, "pandai jugak diorang ni berhujah! siap bagi bukti-bukti yang memebuatkan peminat-peminat Mawi AF 3 terdiam". Tapi bila difikirkan semula, aku rasa tak patut pulak diorang ni tulis benda-benda macam tu dan sebar-sebarkan pulak pada umum. Aku bukan peminat Mawi tapi secara jujurnya aku berterust-terang yang aku memang minat AF. Dan aku BUKAN cuba untuk membela Mawi. Aku cuma ingin menegur pengarang 'MAWI CRAP' dan orang-orang yang men'forward' kan mesej tersebut. Anda tak rasa ke perbuatan anda itu sebenarnya mengaibkan insan bernama Mawi? Anda tak fikir ke balasan Allah ta'ala bila kita mengaibkan orang? Anda tak fikir ke bukan Mawi seorang je Qari dalam Malaysia ni?Hanya kerana ada pihak yang menyiarkan tentang latar belakang Mawi, seorang Qari. Bukan ke ramai lagi orang-orang yang bersekolah agama mahupun yang belajar di institusi agama yang perangainya lebih teruk dari itu. Jangan kata lelaki, perempuan pun sama je. Cuba anda semua fikirkan. Think out of the box. Jangan sempitkan fikiran kita. Saya rasa ramai lagi yang lebih teruk dari Mawi. Ada je orang Islam yang terkinja-kinja di kelab-kelab malam! Ada je orang-orang Islam yang hanyut dengan najis dadah! Ada je orang Islam yang meneguk arak seumpama meneguk air! Ada je orang Islam lain yang menyanyi merangkul berpuluh-puluh anugerah?! Kenapa mesti tertumpu kepada Mawi seorang? Hanya kerana dia seorang Qari? Dalam surah An-Nur: 30, memang Allah menyuruh kita menyuruh kita menjaga pandangan, tapi setahu aku, Allah taklah pulak kata hanya Qari je yang perlu menjaga pandangan. Allah tak kata hanya Qari yang bernama Mawi sahaja yang perlu menjaga pandangan?! Setahu saya, kebanyakkan penyanyi-penyanyi tanah air kita ni, melayu yang beragama Islam. Majoritinya perempuan. Pakaian terdedah sana, terdedah sini, takde pulak orang forward kan mesej-mesej layang ni. Oh! baru saya teringat, mungkin sebab mereka BUKAN Qari kut??? Pada pendapat aku, keputusan Mawi untuk menyertai AF3 adalah urusan dia dengan Allah Ta'ala. Kita tak ada hak nak kutuk-kutuk apa yang dia buat. Memang ada perkara-perkara yang dia lakukan agak tidak menyenangkan tapi bukan dia sahaja orang Islam yang menyertai program ni. Ada je yang secara rela berpengang-pegangan tangan, tak ada pulak orang yang kutuk? Mungkin sebab mereka bukan Qari kut?? Bagi aku, sebelum kita sibuk mengata tentang hal orang, lebih baik kita 'check' dulu diri kita. Cuba perbaiki kelemahan diri kita sebelum kita mengata, mengutuk atau mencaci orang lain.

Sekali lagi aku ingatkan kepada semua, aku menulis bukan kerana aku peminat si Mawi ni. Aku cuma menegur kerana aku sayangkan orang Islam. Hanya kerana mesej forward-forward yang mengaibkan ni, ada hamba Allah yang ditanya di padang Mahsyar kelak. Memang niat sebenarnya baik untuk menegur tapi dengan menyebut nama sekali, ini dah kira mengaibkan orang. aku menegur bukan sahaja orang-orang disekelilingku (kawan-kawan) juga pada diri aku sendiri. Ini bukan pasal Mawi sahaja tapi ini mesej peringatan dari orang Islam kepada orang Islam lain. Wahai anak-nak Adam, tak takut ke...

Mesej dipetik dari buletin Friendster.
Pandangan Pertama (1)
Dahulu Mawi: Seorang qari yang pernah melunakkan bacaan al- Quran. Antara petikan surah yang pernah dibaca dan dilalui sepanjang hidupnya: "Katakanlah kepada orang laki-laki yang beriman; hendaklah mereka menahan (merendahkan) pandangannya dan memelihara kemaluannya; yang demikian itu adalah lebih suci bagi mereka, sesungguhnya Allah Maha Mengetahui apa yang mereka perbuat" (Surah An-Nur ayat 30). Dan mengakhiri surah-surah yang dibaca sambil> duduk bersila penuh tertib dan adabnya.

Kini Mawi:Qari yang sama memerdukan dan menyaringkan nyanyian. Antara petikan lagu dendangannya: "siapa bilang gadis Melayu tak menawan, tak menarik hati tiada memikat. Aduhai, lemah lembut gayanya." (lagu penyanyi lama) Dan mengakhiri lagunya sambil menari lantas memandang tepat ke arah wanita yang berdiri di sisinya.

Pandangan Kedua (2) Dahulu Mawi Seorang bilal yang pernah melaung azan sambil berdiri tegak. Antara terjemahannya membawa erti "...menuju kejayaan" Kini Mawi Bilal yang sama menyanyi lagu tema rancangan sambil menari rancak. Antara alunannya berbunyi "...menuju puncak". Pandangan Ketiga (3) Memetik kata Mawi " ....dia mesti bertudung..." Dengan petikan itu maka;
1. Tudung Mawi diberi nama dan laku diniagakan
2. Seorang peserta bukan Islam memakai tudung secara bergurau lantas mengejar Mawi
3. Seorang juri wanita Islam yang tidak bertudung tidak semena-mena memakai tudung berbentuk selendang di kepala seraya berkata "saya kalau nak komen Mawi mesti pakai tudung." Lantas disambut gelak hilai, sorakan, teriakan dan jeritan penonton menyambung gurauan dan perbuatan main-main ke atas tudung ini. Main-main dengan hukum Allah.

Pandangan Keempat (4) Fanatik, penyokong dan penonton Islam Mawi akan mempertahankan Mawi habis-habisan apabila dimaki tetapi apabila Nabi dan agama Islam sendiri dicaci, di mana kalian 'bersembunyi' selama ini?

Doakan aku ye...

Aku dah decide nak join 'inter-kuliyyah' debate competition. Ini first time aku join debate. takut gak laa... tapi Syaz ngan Dayat cakap there's nothing to lose kalau kalah sekali pun. Betul gak cakap diorang, lagipun aku tengah belajar it's part of learning experience. Aku harap kawan-kawan aku support aku and doakan kejayaan aku...Amiiin

For crying out loud!!

Tak suka! tak suka!! I hate this feeling!! Like my friends always say, I easily fall in love with anybody!! I need to change!!! It's disgusting!!! I'm tired and sick of this feeling! I should have known better than to feel like this. Come on, Tih! Be professional!! Semua ni sementara je... esok-esok, hilanglah tu!! The thing is, I can't controll this feeling... tak pasal-pasal nak jealous! Giler apa!! AaaaaaAaaAaaA.....I can't wait for it to end... It's killing me!!! All the crap of having this stupid feeling with my own colleague!! People will laugh at me...Nooooo!!!! Atih, it's just a fling, ok! So, forget about it!!

p/s: for those who heve read this, please don't ask why. I'll tell you if feel like telling it to someone.

Result from the personality quiz at tickle.com

fatihah, you're a Politician!

You're forceful, innovative, and popular with the masses. You aggressively pursue your goals, and you enjoy impressing people. You've always been surrounded by friends and loved ones and have a natural sense of showmanship.

You're perfect for any work that requires personal interaction and you never say anything that offends anyone — at least to their face.

Result from the personality quiz at tickle.com

fatihah, you're a Politician!

You're forceful, innovative, and popular with the masses. You aggressively pursue your goals, and you enjoy impressing people. You've always been surrounded by friends and loved ones and have a natural sense of showmanship.

You're perfect for any work that requires personal interaction and you never say anything that offends anyone — at least to their face.

Busy sangat ke aku?

Hanim selalu tanya,"kau tak letih ke, Tih?"
Aku pun menjawab,"Entah! tak rasa pape pun... Penat tu penat lah gak, tapi aku minat lagi pun aku yang pilih nak join benda-benda nie.."
Hanim membalas,"Kalau sakit nanti, jangan cari aku"
Aku jawab lagi, kali ni dalam hati,"Eleh! bila aku demam dia yang risau-risau...heheh"
Kali ni secara lisan aku menjawab,"Jangan risau, Nim... Kalau aku demam, ko jugak yang aku cari...heheh"
Hanim pun berkata sambil gelak-gelak,"Hampeh ko, Tih!"
Hanim berkata lagi,"Actually, kita sebenarnya sama je.. aku minat ngan netball, ko lak ngan teater.. yang bezanya waktu je..Aku petang, ko malam..."
Aku lak balas,"Tau takpe!"
Kitorang gelak,"Kahkahakahkah!!!!"

Program yang aku join:
1. CONVEST 05'
2. Pesta Teater Selangor(PTS)
3. Debate Club
4. Public Speaking Class
5. Caring Club

Coming soon:
-Sewing Class

Dalam perancangan (mungkin):
-Quranic Youth Club's program (kelas mengaji)
-Debate inter-Kuliyyah (kena confirm ngan Dayat and Syaz dulu)

Busy sangat ke aku ni? aku tak rasa pun... pasal ada orang balik bilik kul 2-3pagi. At least aku paling lewat pun kul 12am, pasal training PTS.

Kerana Dia..

Kerana Dia

Kerana Dia
Aku lambat pegi kelas
Kerana Dia
Aku terlebih tido pagi tadi
Kerana Dia
Aku kena perli 'baik' punya ngan ustazah
Kerana Dia
Aku kena soal ngan pak guard
Kerana Dia
Aku terlepas breakfast
Aku tak boleh nak cakap aku 'missed' subuh pasal aku pun tak boleh solat
Kerana Dia
Muka aku nampak sembab pagi ni
Kerana Dia
Aku boleh 'update' entry baru hari ni
Dan kerana Dia
Aku boleh tersenyum sendiri hari ni

I Promise by Stacie Orrico

I Promise- Stacie Orrico

Will I always be there for you
When you need someone
Will I be that one you need
Will I do all my best to
To protect you
When the tears get near your eyes
Will I be the one that's by your side

Will I be there when you call me in the middle of the night
Will i keep the rain from fallin down into your life
I promise, I promise
I promise I will

Will I take tender care of you
Take your darkest night
And make it bright for you
Will I be there to make you strong
And to lean on
When this world has turned so cold
Will I be the one that's there to hold

Will I be there when you call me in the middle of the night
Will I keep the rain from falling down into your life
I promise, I promise
I promise, I promise
I promise I will, yeah

And I love you more every day
And nothing will take that love away
When you need someone
I'll promise I'll be there for you
There for you

Will I be there when you call me in the middle of the night
Will I keep the rain from falling down into your life
I promise, I promise
I promise I will, yeah

I can easily fall...

I can easily fall...

Now I know, I can easily fall in love and out of love. Sometimes I even cry when I really like somebody...(when I say like, I mean like+like=love kot!). Ntahlah....When ever I met someone that I really like, I always hope for him to like me back...(damanding kan!). This time, the person that I like+like is my own friend. Not really a close friend but we went out couple of times with other friends too. I think he's sweet (Amrah thinks so too). Hmmm.... baru je kenal dah suka...senang sangat laa...huhuhuuu... I'm stuck between my mom and my self....Huhu.. Amrah, nak "Tan Sri" laaa (Tan Sri is a code name for this guy. I've mentioned his name before in my previous entries).

Hmmm... baru-baru ni kluar ngan Imran, Kaba, Adi ngan Amrah skali. Cadang nak tengok "War of the Worlds" tapi cadangan hanya tinggal cadangan.... Sampai dah la lambat, Tiket abih langsung.... huhu...Sedey laaa.. So, apalagi, merayau laaa...

p/s: Cam ner nak buat nie... I'm falling...falling...and keep on falling...

skin baru

skin baru
huhu... aku sendiri terkejut blog aku rupanya ada bunyi.... waaahhh kagumnya... sku tukar skin baru pasal dah ter'delete' skin lama... suma detail dalam tuh dah hilang... so, terpaksalah edit template baru..

poem: Time passed by

Poem: Time pass by

Time pass by.

Slowly,

I see it fly,

Patiently,

I keep on waiting.

Very boring, very tiring.

Thank God I'm still breathing

To watch the time flying.

The sun shine happily,

The rays smile brightly,

I close my eyes slowly,

Waited for time to fly

Patiently...

test

Why? What?

Why? What?

Last night he called. Around 2:43 a.m. until 3:15 a.m. why? I don't know… I thought he's happy with his girlfriend now... so, I figure out that he don't need me anymore even though we didn't involve in any relationship. One thing that I don't understand, what does he want? Someone to talk to besides his *tooot* girlfriend?!! I'm not jealous of her (only some people knows)Aaah!! Whatever!!! I don't really remember what do we talked about last night.

Tentang Dia

Tentang Dia

"Have you ever love someone so much
It makes you cry"
Kali nie aku nak cerita tentang seseorang, tentang dia. Mula-mula aku kenal dia waktu aku join satu trip ke rumah anak-anak yatim. Pada mulanya, berat hati jugaklah nak ikut trip ni tapi on the second day, aku dah boleh terima tempat tu, hari kedua ni jugaklah aku mula kenal dengan dia. Asal dia dari negeri Labu Sayong, tua 2 tahun dari aku, very funny, and sangat brotherly. Terus-terang cakap, dia ni memang tak handsome cuma dia je yang perasan handsome (bak kata emma, biasalah budak Law kebanyakkannya memang suka perasan hensem). Dia ni sedap mata memandang, itu pun dari certain angle je... Pendek cerita memang bestlah kenal ngan dia ni... So, I've decided to call him 'abang long' without his knowledge hehehe... Baru-baru ni aku pegi skali lagi ikut trip ke tempat yang sama. Aku tak terfikir pun dia akan ikut sama, Syima yang mula-mula perasan kemunculan dia... Memang happy tak terkira aar... baru aku teringat, niat aku dah menyimpang skit laa...

AaAAaAaAaAaaa... sedih laa bila balik dari trip tu... sedih sebab nanti tak dapat jumpa abang long dah...

Have You Ever

Have You Ever-Brandy

Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever
Have you ever been in love
Been in love so bad
You'd do anything to make them understand
Have you ever had someone steal your heart away
You'd give anything to make them feel the same
Have you ever searched for words to get you in their heart
But you don't know what to say
And you don't know where to start
Have you ever found the one
You've dreamed of all of your life
You'd do just about anything to look into their eyes
Have you finally found the one you've given your heart to
Only to find that one won't give their heart to you
Have you ever closed your eyes and
Dreamed that they were there
And all you can do is wait for the day when they will care....

poem: no title yet..

poem: no title yet

I like it when you call me at night,

I like it when sometimes we fight,

I like the way you stare,

And you are always aware.

I like it when you call me 'cik adik'

Or when you threat 'nak cekik'

And sometimes you are supporting,

I even blushed when you are praising.

Now the fact that you didn't call,

So I tried hard not to fall,

Every night I looked at the wall

Hoping and waiting but nothing at all.

Aku dah bekerja!!

Aku dah berkerja

Skang nie aku dah berkerja... cheeewah! bunyi macam hebat je... skang tengah short sem, aku regis satu subjek je.. kelas aku selasa-khamis, pagi je lak tu... untuk memenuhkan masa yang berlambak tu, aku pun merantau ke seluruh kampus, mencari kerja. Macam member aku, Hanim, dia keje untuk beli hadiah untuk boyfriend dia. Aku lah cari keje untuk dapat experience kot...ntah laa.. Aku keje kat tempat jual tudung, alaa stall kecik-kecik je... Aku keje waktu petang lepas kelas, pukul 2 sampai pukul 6. Bosan seh!! kalau takde customer! duduk laa aku melangut bersendirian tanpa teman berbicara..hehe... ayat poyos!! kekadang yang buat aku marah bila customer nak bukak-bukak tudung dari hanger! kalau satu dua aku tak kisah sangat... ni kalau dah empat lima tu yang buat aku panas... dah la memang panas kat situ betambah-tambah meluaplaa bila customer cam ni datang... aku bukan merungut tapi ni blog aku, sukahati akulahh nak merungut ke...nak melangut ke... (Ha! Amrah, gelak! gelak! hehe... Amrah memang seronok untuk dikenakan..) hari-hari menjual yang paling bahagia bagi aku bila aku boleh jual banyak... tapi ngan aku susah ckit ar.. dapat diskaun!! bukan kedekut.. tapi kesian kat bos. tulah satu-satunya source of income dia... orang melayu cakap, periuk nasi... (bukan rice cooker tau Amrah) Hal-hal gaji aku malas nak citer, yang penting aku memang pekerja yang dedikasi. Ya! tidak syak lagi!! Keje dua hari tapi datang lima hari... Bagus tak!!! kan..kan..kan...Jenet kan..

Mungkin Nanti by Peterpan

Mungkin Nanti by Peter Pan

Saatnya ku berkata mungkin
yang terakhir kalinya
Sudahlah lepaskan semua
Ku yakin inilah waktunya

Mungkin saja kau bukan
yang dulu lagi
Mungkin saja rasa itu telah pergi

Dan mungkin bila nanti kita
kan bertemu lagi
Satu pinta ku jangan kau
Coba tanyakan kembali
Rasa yang ku tinggal mati
Seperti kelmarin saat semua di
sini

Dan bila hatimu termenung
Bangun dari mimpi-mimpimu
Membuka hatimu yang dulu
Cerita saat bersamaku

Mungkin saja kau bukan
yang dulu lagi
Mungkin saja rasa itu telah pergi

Dan mungkin bila nanti kita
kan bertemu lagi
Satu pinta ku jangan kau
Coba tanyakan kembali
Rasa yang ku tinggal mati
Seperti kelmarin saat semua di
sini

Tak usah kau tanyakan lagi
Simpan untukmu sendiri
semua sesal yang kau cari
semua rasa yang kau beri

hmmm...

Hmmm....later lah!

i don't know what to write... errr... i want to write about my school break, i guess maybe later...

I'm cursed!!!!

I'm cursed!!

I just found out bout my result yesterday. and again, I failed my IRK paper. And this time it has to be SOQ. why?? why?? I studied hard for this paper... and I felt good no!! great! after this exam and I failed?!!! Why?!! why?!! this is unfair!!! everytime i registered for two IRK subjects, I will end up failing one of em'. So, I made a conclusion that....I'm CURSED!!!

Kluang, Abang Polis...Roti Bakar

Huhu....letih giler drive from Ayer Keroh to KL. Tak larat beb!! Sempai bilik memang lembik aar.. aku tabik member aku Emma, kaki tak cecah bilik, terus kena gi keje... (Toing...toing...-tabik spring) Tapi apa-apa pun memang syok arr.. gi Kluang, Johor. Cuma satu je yang aku tak puas ati, asal MalayMail kat Kluang kuar lambat sehari ha? Dahlaaa tu paper favourite aku.. ish! pelik tul laa..

Satu malam... kitorang (aku, amrah ngan emma) kluar jalan-jalan cari pasal, on the way nak balik umah, ada road block, emma cakap maybe diaorang nak cari orang...lepas satu, satu kereta dicek sampai giliran kitorang lak. Mak ai!! "amrah, sebelah kanan. comel kan?" emma ngan amrah setuju ngan aku. Abang polis yang cute tu saje je tahan kitorang, yelah... kereta penuh perempuan... polis pun lelaki jugak... bila dia pandang seat belakang, aku sempat lambai-lambai kecik. Dia senyum, aku suka!! actually i'm elated!!! hahahah.... (dahlaa amrah, tak payah laa cakap i gatal... nanti i ari abang bomba untuk u, ek!!) nilah 1st time aku rasa sangat excited bila jumpa polis... Tapi sayang, sekali tu je jumpa abang polis tu...huhuhu...

Pagi tadi, kitorang breakfast kat stesen keretapi. emma cakap kat situ, roti bakar dia memang power laaa.... memang pun tapi sayang, aku kenyang cepat sangat!!! Skang nie dok teringat-ingat roti bakar stesen ketapi tuu.. emma cakap anak tauke dia hensem... blaja kat UITM, Shah Alam. amik course TESL. nama dia Mohd Ridzuan.... mesti hensem, cina mix melayu...

ahhhh......mata dah tekebil-kebil... tahan ngantuk mengadap komputer ni... Amrah cepat laa bagi thumb drive... i nak balik!! dah ngantuk aaarrr...

aku akan berhenti mem'blog' buat sementara waktu. pasal tengah cuti. kat umah takde internet connection...

I'm Ron Weasley

I'm Ron Weasley, my all time Harry Potter character!
Which HP Kid Are You?

puas + tak puas = puas

puas + tak puas = puas

Formula aku untuk minggu ni. Aku puas hati jawab exam hari ni, walaupun aku rasa jawapan aku banyaklah jugak yang dah menyimpang. Aku tetap rasa puas pasal aku cuba jawab sehabis baik!! (Yosh! Peace!! hehe..) Selepas dua hari menjawab paper agama, kini tamatlah sudah zaman ustazah aku... aku akan mula bukak balik bible!

Aku bukan overconfident yang aku boleh score paper ni tapi aku puas hati pasal and seronok pasal tak blur waktu exam...bertambah seronok lagi bila "inspiration" aku duduk dekat ngan aku...

Hmmm... Speaking bout my "inspiration", lepas abis exam hari tu (Wednesday, 24th) cepat-cepat aku jalan sebelah dia...konon-konon nak buat confession tu (refer entry )tapi... it turns out that I don't have the guts to do so...

Kami jalan beriringan untuk beberapa ketika (pasal tengah sesak orang suma nak keluar dewan peperiksaan). Lepas je pintu dewan, kami berpisah membawa haluan masing-masing. Aku merelakan pemergian dia. Pasrah. (Huhu...macam tulis novel melayu lak!!! Ahadiat Akasha pun gulung tikar beb!!) Tim memang kawan yang memahami, dia biarkan aku jalan beriringan dengan "inspiration" aku (Thanks, Tim!). Waktu kami berpisah, aku bagi isyarat kat Tim, "aku tak berani..." Tim senyum.

Aku ambil barang-barang yang aku tinggal kat luar hall. Payung Ada dah takde hmmm... Ada dah pulang ke kampung halaman, Simpang Pulai, Perak.

Tiba-tiba, aku berubah fikiran.
"Eh, Tim, What the hell kan? Baik aku cakap je kat dia... Bila lagi aku nak buat kerja gila cam nie..."
"Betul ko nak bagi tau dia?" Tim tanya.
"Mmm." jawabku tegas.
Pendekkan ceriter, "inspiration" aku bejalan 10meter depan aku ngan Tim. Kitorang cuba untuk jalan selaju yang boleh. Tapi laju-laju kitorang, laju lagi "inspiration" aku bejalan. Hujan turun. Makin lama makin lebat. Aku bersyukur. Kononnya dengan harapan akan stranded di tempat yang sama tapi... harapan hanya tingal harapan. Only Hope. Rupa-rupanya dia tak stranded, digagahi juga kakinya untuk terus melangkah balik ke asrama. Tinggalah aku ngan Tim, stranded pasal takde jalan yang berbumbung untuk balik ke asrama. Sekali lagi aku pasrah.

The lesson from this story is, don't be afraid to take chances! Aaaaaaa.... napelah aku tak pikir?? Aku just nak bagitau dia yang aku suka tengok dia and aku rasa dia cute je... bukannya aku nak confess yang aku cintakan dia... Aku tak puas hati dengan diri aku...

Actually, the main agenda for that day was not the confession but my examination. The confession is just the side dishes. That's why lah formula untuk minggu ni, "puas + tak puas = puas."

Michael Schumacher... simply unbeatable. he's the best ever!
Anak Sultan Selayang

poem: Why?

poem: Why?

Why? Why? Why?
Am I still cry
When I know it's all a lie

I tried
To fight the feeling inside
But I can't hide
And I cried
And I cried

Why? Why? Why?
Am I Still cry
When I know it's all a lie...

i am so in love with this guy!!!!
Anak Sultan Selayang

Kawaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!!!!!!! Takuya-san, Aishteruuuuuuuuuuu!!
Anak Sultan Selayang

him agaaaaiiiinnnn.... love it!!
Anak Sultan Selayang

hehe...it's takuya kimura again!!!! heheee
Anak Sultan Selayang

aaaaaaa.........no words can describe!!!!!!!!!!
Anak Sultan Selayang

aaaa.....gigi arnab pun gigi arnab laaa...suke!suke!suke!!!1
Anak Sultan Selayang

hehehe....tengah angau.... suke!suke!suke!!!!
Anak Sultan Selayang

hehe...finally i manage to find his picture from PRIDE... suke!suke!suke!!
Anak Sultan Selayang

takuya kimura in 'Gift' errr....never heard of it... but, what the heck!
Anak Sultan Selayang

more and more takuya kimura... i'll try to find my favorite character Satonaka Halu.. i haven't watch this series yet.
Anak Sultan Selayang

huhu...takuya kimura.... i'm so... in love with him
Anak Sultan Selayang

Clay AIken- Solitaire

Clay Aiken-Solitaire

There was a man, a lonely man
Who lost his love through his indifference
A heart that cared, that went unchecked
Until it died in his silence

And Solitaire's the only game in town
And every road that takes him, takes him down
And by himself, it's easy to pretend
He'll never love again

And keeping to himself he plays the game
Without her love it always ends the same
While life goes on around him everywhere
He's playing Solitaire

Another day, a lonely day
So much to say that goes unspoken
And through the night, his sleepless nights
His eyes are closed, his heart is broken

And Solitaire's the only game in town
And every road that takes him, takes him down
And by himself it's easy to pretend
She's coming back again

And keeping to himself he plays the game
Without her love it always ends the same
While life goes on around him everywhere
He's playing Solitaire

A little hope, goes up in smoke
Just how it goes, goes without sayingSolitaireee
And by himself it's easy to pretend
He'll never love again
Ohhh

And keeping to himself he plays the game
Without her love it always ends the same
While life goes on around him everywhere
He's playing SolitaireSolitaire, solitaire

Cheers for me

Its ok,
It’s alright,
Come on Atih,
Fight, fight, fight!

Gooooooooo Atih!

I dedicate this cheer to Me, Myself and I. Why? 2 reasons.
First, I did not do get good result for last semester. So, I have to work EXTRA hard for this coming final.
Secondly, I thought I can took it well when Syima told me that she saw him at Istana Budaya with his ex-girlfriend, it turns out...NOT! This is not the first time I have heard this kind of news about him. I try to tell myself that I should not get jealous coz we are more like brother and sister. But I just cannot fight this feeling... AAArgh!!! I hate this! I hate this!! Atih stop feeling like this...he is not yours!!! Fight, fight fight!!!

Ra Ra Ra

i want Takuya Kimura!!! (i know, what a crap!)

I want Takuya-saaaaaaaaan!!!

Semalam tengok PRIDE (Takuya Kimura as Satonaka Halu -Hero citer nie) ngan Amrah. BEST! BEST! Selama nie aku tak heran pun kat si Takuya ni, skang nie dia lah yang aku puja-puja... aku paling tak suka bila dah jadi macam nie. Nanti jadi kemaruk yang sangat-sangat! Walaupun tahu memang mustahil, impossible nak jumpa dia... tapi mungkin kejap je kot... "MAYBE" (Halu selalu sebut perkataan nie). Aaaahhh tapi suka sangat!!! macam nak nangis pun ada...

One week entry #1

One week Entry #1

Monday
It is so embarrassing!! They (people in HS cafe) thought it was me who scream in HS cafe because of the stupid cat!! (Refer to march, 8 entry)

Tuesday
Alright...alright... they say yesterday is history. What past is past... so, I should forget what happened yesterday no matter how embarrassing it was. Nothing really fascinating happened during the day but on the night, it really surprised me. As usual, Tuesday night, I have presentation skill and public speaking class and tonight is the final class for this semester and tonight also is the final round of public speaking competition. Well, surprisingly I am one of the finalists!! (Well done, Tih!) Alright... that is only after 3 of the contestant did not show up that night. So, I have been chose to be one of the 10 finalists. The topic given to me was Debaters makes lousy lover (haha...the best part is all the judges are debaters and I strongly agree with the topic!). Well my stand towards the topic does not really affect me coz all of them judge me professionally (no heart feeling...). In short, I did not won but my friend, Dayat won 3rd place (Congrats, Dayat! I am proud of you!). I could not wait for this weekend to tell my mom everything and I think she will be proud of me (hehe...perasan...). Even though I did not win, I did not feel bad at all...coz we celebrated the final class with with my favourite Dunkin Donut! (Naaah... that's not it). Actually, I'm kinda proud of myself coz I have been listed as one of the finalist. Therefore, Tuesday, 8th of March is quite a satisfying day.

Wednesday
Hmmm... Nothing much happened in Wednesday. Just that Me and Tim were rushing to finish up our assignments. Oh ya! I met my long lost junior in Matric, Mimi. She is still cute like before and I am really glad that we have finally met each other here in main campus. Plus, she said I am slimmer than in Matric (hehe... I am sure glad to hear that from her)

Thursday
Another satisfying day of the week. I have finished my memorization of some Surah in the Quran but still working on my assignments. I have got 2 assignments, one group assignment and the other one is individual assignment, which due 3 weeks ago... (ok Amrah, you can lecture me later...) oh, before I forget, I have received an email from my best'est' buddy (Thong Ouen Czing) in U.S. I have not heard anything from her for almost 6 month! Really miss her!! Err... one more thing, I won a prize today!! It is not a big competition or anything just a simple quiz in phonetics class and they gave prizes to those who answer correctly. I did answer their question and they gave me a small note book and a pen (I know...I know... big deal!) you can get it at the stationary shop but I already save at least RM 2++ (hehe.. do not get me wrong) I am not stingy!!

Today, Friday
Like I said in February, 24th entry, I will confessed to "my Inspiration" about how I felt about him, on the last class, which is today. It turns out that I did not get a chance to talk to him coz he is busy chasing after our lecturer. So, I guess I have to postpone it until the day of our final exam. (I will only be meeting him on that day).

Others
Congrats to Fid for the new beginning of her love life (I'm still looking for one).
Tim, I am happy for you... (You know why... Tim)
And for these people:
* Siti Nursyifa’ Mat Sulihan (Syifa)
* Faridah Azizan (Farid)
* Nor Hafizah Abdullah (Fieza)
* Nur Hasanah Md Akhir (Bold)
* Thong Ouen Czing (Thong)
* Mahirah Shahbuddin (Mahirah)
* Khadijah Came Abd Malik (Khaty)
* Summaiyyah Came Abd Malik (Sumaiyyah)
I really miss you guys sooooooooo Much!!!!

Finally, to all my friends (In UIA), I wanna say "Lets strive for the up coming final after 4 month of study it's time for us to show our real potential. Do not give up if you still have something to give, Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying".

It Wasn't ME!!!!!!!!!!!!

It wasn't Meeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Semalam aku makan kat HS cafe (the most happening cafe in the campus). Lepas makan, biasalah duduk lepak-lepak ngan member-member. Satu benda yang aku tak suka, kalau dah duduk kat sini, mesti melekat! Pastu, satu kerja pun tak jadi!

Actually, dah lama kau tak duduk kat situ. Bukan apa, busy... lagi pun malas lah! Buang masa.. ( I know, Amrah... I know... you mesti cakap I poyo kan?) daripada duduk kat situ baik aku balik bilik, basuh baju ke... pergi lab, update blog ke... ada gak pekdah nyer.. tak kisahla... benda yang aku nak cerita ni jadi semalam lepas kenyang menyantap, aku lepak-lepak dulu nagn member sebelum pergi kelas. Tak lama lepas tu Syima datang, baru lepas kelas tilawah katanya.

Tiba-tiba datang seekor kucing hitam, lapar, comel. Amrah memang suka kucing, dia angkat kucing tu dan belai-belai dia. Aku bagitau Amrah yang aku pun nak belai dia jugak. So, Amrah letak kucing tu kat atas meja. Aku tarik kaki depan kucing tu supaya aku boleh letak dia kat atas riba aku. Tapi Amrah cakap kaki dia kotor.. so, tak jadilah. Aku lepas kan dia, dia melompat turun.

Suddenly, I heard a girl screamed. Rupa-rupanya dia terkejut pasal kucing tu melompat. Yang tak best nya, bila orang lain menjerit, orang lain yang dapat nama. HS cafe senyap. Semua mata tertumpu pada aku. Muka aku jadi panas (blushing sebab malu) Malu Giler!!! Bukan Aku!!!!!!!!!!! Bukan Aku!!!! It wasn’t me!!! It was not me!!! Tak kuasa aku nak menjerit-jerit kat situ!!! Tidaaaaakkkkk!!!!

Tiba-tiba aku teringat

Tiba-tiba aku teringat...

Izinkan aku melafazkan isi hatiku
Kau yang satu,
bagiku tiada lain darimu
Pasti ku kan ubati lukamu segala kemahuanmu, kuberi
Janjiku padamu hatiku hanya untukmu

Tiada yang lain darimu
Hasratku hanyalah untuk mu
Izinkan aku lafazkan isi hatiku

Masihkah aku
Bertakhta di hatimu
Janjiku padamu
Hatiku kau perlu tahu...

Mainanku igauanku hanya perasaan yang menular
Haruskah dirimu, membenci diriku
Kupohon maaf darimu

Tiada yang lain darimu
Hasratku hanyalah untukmu
Berikan diriku
Secebis senyum tawamu

Bagaikan mentari di hati
Bila kau kembali di sisi
Kau membawa erti hidupku ini
Kembali berseri...

Bila dengar lagu ni je, aku teringat kat dia. Yelah... waktu dulu-dulu... aku pernah dedicate lagu ni kat dia tapi dia tak tahu pun.. aku bagi tau kengkawan perempuan aku je.. kiranya ala-ala "theme song" kitorang arr... aku tak pernah resa bodoh waktu aku couple dengan dia dulu Cuma, yelah! Aku ni orangnya yang lekas naik bosan and I admit salah aku gak!

Bila dah tahu things like this will happened, aku tak pernah ada initiative nak berubah pun. Tapi apa-apa pun.. benda dah jadi, nak buat macam mana, cakap apa pun tak guna.
Kitorang still remains friends and kadang-kadang bila terjumpa dia and sembang sekejap ngan dia pun aku dah rasa seronok.

Sekarang dia sudah berpunya, alah... pusing-pusing dengan senior satu course jugak! Tak berkembang langsung..hehe.. tapi tak berkembang pun, dia jugak yang bahagia! Bukan aku. But I’m happy for him. Aku jugaklah yang bertepuk sebelah tangan. Nak buat macam mana labu...dah nasib badan...

Kalau aku boleh bagitau dia apa yang aku rasa sekarang, aku nak cakap kat dia that I regretted what I did, I'm sorry. You owned a special place in my heart.
I'm sorry...

My Inspiration

My "Inspiration"

He really inspired me to go to class. His “Beckam” hairstyle... and the way he he dressed... really attract me to know him... Memang sempoi!
Semalam dia tak datang! Dah la tak datang, kelas terasa lama lak tuh! Dah la takde inspiration, memang boring gileeeerrr ar dalam kelas!!
Hari aku dapat paper mid-term S.O.Q. hari tulah yang paling syok sekali. Bukan pasal aku pass exam ke apa, tapi pasal aku dapat tahu nama sumber inspirasiku yang selama ni remain mystery (jeng...jeng...jeng). Kalau sebelum ni aku dok agak nama dia Faizal, lepas dapat paper aku terus tahu nama dia Mohd Nadzri Mohd Ayub. Yang best lagi, siap tahu dia course apa... budak HS, 3rd year rupanya.. macam mane aku tahu nama dia? Waktu sir tengah bagi paper, panggil nama sorang-sorang, aku memang tekun mendengar, mendengar nama inspirasiku. Bila nama yang aku mula-mula aku teka salah, aku terus teka nama dia Nadzri. Rupa-rupanya betul!! Syok giler!! Syok memanglah syok tapi yang tak syoknya bila aku kantoi paper mid-term aku!!
Penat aku "goreng", dia bagi markah skill menggoreng je kat aku! Dah tu tak bagi pulak markah "rencah ramuan" aku. Menyesal laaa... Lain kali baca resepi bebetul! Nie tak, malas! Padan muka aku!
Bebalik kepada inspirasi aku, aku dah nekad nak confess yang aku suka dia... aku suka tengok dia... Dia memang S-O-Qt! Bile? Final class SOQ...
Gambatte Kudasai!!!

Me and my-used-to-be-prince charming. Now? Nota anymore! 

Thaaaat's me! and my princess buddy, Syima! 

poem: ATUK

poem: ATUK

Looking at him,
Emotionless.
Listening to him,
Restless.

Now in my head,
Fill with emptiness.
Hever failed,
To never make me sleepless.

From Elit to Shakespeare,
As You Like It to Lear,
Not many would appear,
Even I sometimes dissapear.

But atuk is always there,
Attend or absent he never care,
If you're not listening, he won't stare,
That is atuk who loves to share.


15:05
16/02/05


atuk ni bukan nenda aku.. tp lecturer aku.. dah tua.. paham-paham jelah.. student kan memang suka bagi gelaran yang bukan-bukan kat lecturer ni.. nilah dia bebudak skang, macam mana nak berkat belajar!! tapi aku pun suka bagi nama gelaran baru kat orang, cam putera sorang nie, nama dia sao tapi aku tukar jadi putera masao. cam jepun lak! pendek citer, ramailah yang aku dah tukar...